embracing all of you
Can we give ourselves permission to be messy?
Can we give ourselves permission to be human?
Can we give ourselves permission to make “mistakes”?
Scorpio season has finished (thank God) and after taking time away to heal and rest after getting very sick, I’ve been revisiting my creativity.
It feels like I am back at square one in many ways.
As I start making music again or continue learning about creating 3D games and films, I notice how that inner critic get SO LOUD.
No one cares about your art. You can’t make money with this. You are such a beginner.
Perfectionism can be so sneaky and it has it’s own way of creeping into our self expression.
As children we’ve been abused and as adults, we take on the role of the abuser unknowingly.
Perfectionism prevents so many from creating and sharing with their world their heart.
We need your art & heart because it invites people to see their own humanity.
I mean look what’s happening to the children in Congo right now.
Sharing your humanity invites people to develop compassion and respect for each other.
Healing perfectionism begins with looking at your childhood.
As I think about my own childhood, I was only rewarded with praise when I brought home an A+. B’s we’re never good enough.
This plays out in my adult life as waiting for someone outside of me to validate me and I’m so hard on myself.
For example, I’ve been wanting to write a book for the longest and still find that impossible to do because in the back of my mind, everything has to be perfect so that I can be loved and accepted.
My inner child wants to deeply feel a sense of belonging in this world.
As the healthier adult, it’s my role to remind myself and him that I/we belong and it’s also my role to invite in healthier relationships that support that sense of belonging.
The healing journey begins with allowing yourself to be a victim, which for many is hard.
You might have a hard time with being the victim, especially if you are a man.
It might feel weak yet it’s necessary.
It’s okay to be angry at your primary care takers. It’s okay to blame them.
Those feelings are valid and that’s where learning to set boundaries begin.
In some way your primary care takers are still in your head preventing you from owning all of who you are and sharing that with the world.
We have to train ourselves with ourselves in private.
You may want to visualize your inner child behind you and as the adult, you are sharing with that parent that is also a visualization…
“Dad/Mom, it makes me sad I may never hear the words I’m proud of you but not sharing my true self with the world is killing me. I only have ONE LIFE!”
As you practice this more and more, you will begin to surprise yourself how at peace you are with being you and sharing you.
If you want to dive deeper on healing perfectionism, finding your purpose, and strengthening your creativity, I’m open for a free 30 minute phone/video call. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. We can also discuss what a coaching container could like that works for your financial situation.